In
our work we sometimes find that healing plays an important role
helping leaders and organizations live up to their promise. We hope that
you find these reflections on healing helpful on your journey. We invite
you to visit inTEgro's web site (www.integro-inc.com) where you
will find additional resources for developing leaders and organizations
and creating sustainable results. You will also find an on-line version
of this article on our web site and a growing collection of quotes on
leadership and organizational integrity.
- Al Watts
On
Healing - When Can We Feel "Whole" Again?
Healing has been on my mind a lot the last few months. It
probably started with 9/11 - the collective shock to our system, anger,
hurt and pain that continue to play out in our lives and call for healing.
That horrific tragedy sensitized me to other events and circumstances -
some in the public arena and some more personal - and what healing means.
On the personal side, my ninety year-old mother broke her leg this winter,
and recently returned home after nearly four months in rehab. Also, our
family has been helping our youngest daughter manage a chronic illness for
nearly five years. Both situations remind me of an important distinction
between "curing" and "healing" that a friend and pastor, Ron Cottone, once
made for our congregation: "Curing" has to do more with restoring to a
former state, as in being cured of pneumonia. "Healing" may not mean
curing or restoring to a former state, but instead coming to terms with a
new reality or circumstances. Holding out for a "cure" - elimination of a
problem or restoration to a former state - may in fact prevent or delay
healing. Curing implies one-time or limited duration treatment, but is
more likely an ongoing process. My mother will likely never again be able
to get in and out of my vintage two-seater convertible for a cruise to see
the fall colors. Dwelling on that, though, will take away from motivation
and energy to do what she needs to do to be as happy and mobile as
possible in the new reality. What situations or circumstances are there
in our lives - or organizations - where we are "holding out for a cure,"
or hoping for restoration to the way things used to be, when what we
really need to do is get about the business of healing, or adapting to new
realities?
My friend Ron is somewhat of a Greek scholar, and tells me that there are
three Greek words - a noun and two verbs - used in the Bible for
"healing." All three words come from the same root as the English word
"therapy:" therapeuo, which basically means to listen and serve
others. A "therapist," then - and I would argue a leader - is someone who
creates an environment where healing can take place by listening to and
serving others. Whether serving to help others heal from 9/11, from the
pain of layoffs or the anxiety that accompanies restructuring and change,
then, leaders need to cultivate their therapeuo capacity and
listening skills. The kind of listening needed is deep and patient
listening - listening without an agenda.
"Healing" implies a break, rift or loss of some kind. 9/11 is
fundamentally about the loss of lives, the reality we knew and the future
we hoped for. In the last few months we have experienced a different kind
of loss as well - a loss or breakdown of trust in business leaders and the
institutions they lead - thanks to the likes of Enron, Anderson
Consulting, Global Crossing, Merrill Lynch and other notable examples. Those
organizations have in turn lost their reputations and to a large degree
their identities. Many who worked for those organizations have lost their
jobs and livelihood, as well as their reputations and identities. How can
we begin to heal the pain and loss caused by leaders and institutions that
squander the trust of investors, customers, employees and the community?
Here again, deep and respectful listening without defensiveness or an
agenda helps. It is also important to:
Face the facts and tell the truth. Part of what aggravated
damage to Enron and Anderson consulting was lack of awareness, or
perhaps a refusal to face the facts early enough, about document
shredding and other illegal or unethical practices in their
organizations. Just as recovery from emotional trauma requires
acknowledging, first to ourselves, the reality of what happened,
organizations accused of wrongdoing need to do the same. There are many
examples of companies under suspicion of unethical or illegal practices
that have, in the course of their own fearless self-examination, quickly
owned up to improper behavior and consequently minimized damages.
Waiting for external parties to uncover the truth, or worse yet denying
it, only aggravates the situation. I recently spoke with middle managers
of a company that had been under investigation by their state attorney
general and that initially denied the attorney general's allegations.
The managers said that what really hurt them the most was believing and
communicating the "company line," then later having to tell employees
about their company's admission to improprieties.
Accept responsibility and apologize - sincerely. Part of
facing reality and telling the truth may be acknowledging our own role
or responsibility for a loss of trust or the source of pain. Open,
authentic admission of errors, lapses in judgment or wrongs can serve as
a catalyst for real healing and for moving together again to rebuild.
Address "root causes," learn and move on. Apologies are
not always sufficient. Just as in relationships that go awry because of
bad behavior, people are often not ready to move on with an apology
alone. They need to have some confidence that things will be different
in the future. Remedies for restoring confidence vary, depending on the
severity and causes of the trust breach. When there have been serious
ethical lapses, leaders may need to be replaced, boards removed,
businesses reorganized or sold, or cultures redefined. In the case of
the earlier example where middle managers' trust had been violated, it
was all of the above. Creating or rebuilding strong cultures "from the
inside out" is the best strategy for rebuilding trust and assuring good
corporate citizenship. When people really understand and believe in
their organization's core values, and when those values are modeled by
the leaders and reinforced by its systems (who is hired or fired, how
people are paid, what gets measured, etc.,) values become part of the
organization's "DNA." Then no matter how decentralized operations get or
how strong the pressure, chances are high that people will "do the right
thing."
Sometimes forgiveness - of others or ourselves - is required to heal and
move on. In the movie "The Rookie," we learn that Jim Morris,
played by Dennis Quaid, had never forgiven his Navy father for constantly
moving the family and taking no interest in his passion for baseball.
When, late in life for a "rookie," Jim realizes his boyhood passion - to
pitch for the majors, his estranged father shows up after Jim's first game
to congratulate him on his win. In his own way he awkwardly apologizes for
all of "Jimmy's" lost opportunities, and Jim presents his father with the
game ball. We can see in that moment of grace that Jim has forgiven his
father, and that many years of pain and resentment were losing their grip.
Who or what needs forgiveness in our lives or organizations so we can
move on?
So healing requires acknowledgement of the facts or a new reality, deep
listening and taking responsibility. Sometimes it requires apologies and
forgiveness. However we get there, eventually healing means moving on, to
a modified reality and perhaps something very different. It is helpful to
remember that moving on means transition, which William Bridges has
helped us understand is different than change. Corporate
restructuring, a new organizational mission or a new role are examples of
change. In the personal arena, loss of a loved one, deterioration
of health, or starting to use a walker or wheelchair are examples of
change. As Dr. Bridges points out, however, transition is the
psychological process we go through adapting to changes like these. That
psychological process begins with Endings - acknowledging losses
and letting go. The middle stage is what Dr. Bridges calls the Neutral
Zone - redefining and reorienting (usually accompanied by some
disorientation.) In the Neutral Zone we are not quite sure yet what
the changes mean or what we are supposed to do. It is often the longest
and most difficult transition stage; we may have come to grips with our
losses and what doesn't exist any more, but have not really gotten
the swing of what is new yet. This is where people usually need the most
help - sometimes in the form of reminders about why things are different
than they were, and training or support for adjusting to a new state. The
last stage of transition is New Beginnings - psychological
readiness to move on. Actual changes are tangible and occur at a point in
time. Transition is a psychological process that adopts different
forms and operates on different timetables for different people.
inTEgro's mission is to serve as a catalyst for leadership and
organizational integrity. My dictionary's second definition for
"integrity" is wholeness, or completeness. The third definition is
the quality or state of being unimpaired. To be effective leaders
and build whole, unimpaired organization we need to know what needs
healing and about the healing process. What healing needs to take place
so we can live whole, unimpaired lives? Where is there need for healing so
we can build whole, unimpaired organizations?
"Healing
may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of
everything that isn't you - all of the expectations, all of the beliefs
- and becoming what you are."
- Rachel Naomi Remen
What's New?
Click on "What's New" when you visit www.integro-inc.com for
a downloadable copy of "Building Ethical Cultures From the
Inside-Out" - presented by Al Watts at the 2002 Minnesota Ethical
Business Educational Forum and Awards Banquet.
Coming soon to www.integro-inc.com
. . .
• Building Better Boards
• The New World of Work
